My son is 1/2! I have to say that up until this point, I have just one o loved being a mom. Now, I am infinity o loooooooooooooooooving being a mom! Isaac is really starting to become a real person, not just a lump that you care for. Although, I did love my little lump. He was a cute little lump. But now it’s amazing to see him interact with us, reach for toys he wants, laugh when you tickle his neck, roll himself around the house, “help” feed himself with his spoon, & so many more I’m becoming independent moments. It has truly been a turning point month. I feel like we are finally getting into a predictable routine, things are getting back to normal (a new normal of course) & mom is cooking dinner again! Yes!
Make. Let. Make. Bribe. Ask Nicely if Dad Will Help Out.
Let me just state for the record that I have a wonderful husband who is an amazing daddy to Isaac. I just don’t think men are wired to take the reigns of baby-care like moms are. Good for you if yours has, but my dear husband has never been one to come to me and say, ‘Darling, may I please take care of all the baby responsibilities for tonight?’ Let’s face it, women are historically the caregivers of babies for a reason. Not that they aren’t fully capable, but I think most men are a bit scared of caring for an infant all by themselves. (Wait until Isaac gets older, then I’ll probably be the one asking for time with him.) Plus, if you’re anything like me, you have your routine & probably don’t leave much room for Dad to help out… But, in order to save your sanity & protect your motherly love & devotion, take some time off. Trust me. Just one night does amazing wonders. Whether you go to sleep early, go out for Happy Hour, read a book, or take a freaking bath!! Dad can do it, sometimes you just have to ask…
Confession: There’s a silly part of me that almost sort of wishes Isaac wouldn’t sleep as well when Michael puts him to bed. You know, to be like, ‘Oh my baby just needs me!’ But honestly, he sleeps the same on all the nights with Dad as the nights I put him to sleep myself. Even if Michael doesn’t do the baby yoga poses I do with Isaac, or burp him for 500 pats like I do (yes I count), or lay him down after 1.5 lullabies, 2 kisses on the cheek, & whispering, ‘night night’ into the baby’s ear. He has his own way, & I have to admit, that works too.
Isaac loves his Daddy! And I’m pretty sure Daddy is a little whipped over Isaac too… ;-)
Take Time to Look Back. And Appreciate the Silly Things.
As a new mom, I find myself with blinders on, only looking at what’s directly in front of me. I don’t remember much from yesterday, I haven’t thought much about tomorrow. Today is where my thoughts are. Which is good, but it’s also important to reflect & remember just how far you’ve come in such a short time. I was sorting through all the bazillions of pictures we have of Isaac’s first half year of life, & I was amazed at how much has changed. I just needed to take a second to stop and think about it to realize how much growth & change we’ve all gone through in six short months!
Hello belly. Wait, let me check something… Oh yes the baby is out… So what’s in there?!? Wow I’m pretty happy with myself now! =D
Nighttime Waking Log: We kept a log for about a week to try to figure out what his patterns were & what would help him fall back asleep.Y’all thought I was exaggerating when I said we were having a rough time! Ha!
Here’s Isaac at about 2 weeks old! Here he is at 6 months!
Look at those skinny legs! He’s gained a little weight :)
There are also numerous silly things you do, say, think about, forget, & repeat. It’s just part of being a good mommy. So laugh when you catch yourself in the mirror making a stupid face trying to get your baby to giggle, when you realize you’re trying to get your baby to open for the spoon by opening your mouth wide, when you catch yourself daydreaming about how you should organize their toys, or when your baby sucks on your chin & it’s just too cute to be grossed out.
I sing Hush Little Baby approximately 12 times a day. I need to learn new lullabies. I always say, ‘I’m going to sing a hymn or some other song this time!’ But then it comes time to start singing & the only thing that’s in my brain is ‘Hush little baby, don’t say a word…”
My baby is similar to our dog. He drools everywhere, he loves toys that squeak, he will pee & throw up on the carpet if left alone, & we’re currently trying to master the command to “stay.”
Sophie the squeaker toy… Quickly becoming a favorite. I didn’t take a picture (and if I did I most definitely wouldn’t share it) but Isaac did poop on the ground/himself during some naked play time this month. Thankfully we had a washable pad down. Gross boy!
Grizzly is teaching Isaac too much! =]
Confession: So at the hospital, we filled out all this paperwork. One form we filled out was for his birth certificate. Yes, of course we want a piece of paper showing we are the parents. Ok. Fast forward about 6 months. We’re getting ready to take a trip to Texas, & we wonder, ‘hmm what identification do we need for Isaac to get him on the plane?’ He has no ID or passport, so we find out we need a birth certificate. No problem, right? All good parents have a copy of their child’s birth certificate… Right?? Well here’s the trick! The paperwork you fill out for the birth certificate in the hospital doesn’t actually get you the birth certificate! Who makes up these rules anyways?!? Gah. So, the day we’re scheduled to get on an airplane to fly to Texas, Michael goes to the vital records office and THANK GOD gets Isaac’s actual, real, paper birth certificate. Sheesh.
I'm Not Cut Out for This!!
Here’s my serious confession for the month! =] This motherhood thing is becoming a lot more fun, a lot more exciting, & a lot more comfortable. However, I really am struggling with anxiety & worry over my baby… For example:
Should we use a swaddle? When do we stop? Should we use a pacifier? Is it time for a nap? Should I wait 10 minutes? Why won’t he fall asleep? Is he hungry? He shouldn’t be up this early, why did he wake up early? Should we let him cry? Should we let him cry more? Should we just go get him up? Why is he tired if he just woke up? Why is he fussy? Why won’t he eat? But the book says…
You might be thinking, ‘Sheesh, girl, get a hold of yourself.’ I know. It gets better. I know. He will sleep through the night sometime. I know. My child didn't nap well at all. I'm sorry. Every baby is different. Really? I had no idea. He's a happy baby, you shouldn’t worry about it. Thanks. And yes, I know. You’ll miss this time. Not now, please. And I know. This one disastrous nap won’t matter in the long run. I know. He’ll get on a schedule eventually. I’m sure he will. Just go with the flow, it’s fine. You obviously don’t know me very well. I’m trying!!
Ok, before I get myself worked up, I’ll stop. But the point is, I know I shouldn’t be worrying so much. I know it’s not a big deal in the grand scheme of world issues. I know that this time will pass. I know I know I know. But that doesn’t mean I don’t still feel anxious when he doesn’t get a good nap, cries for unknown reasons, doesn’t fall asleep easily, or is showing signs of being tired at odd times of the day. My chest gets tight & I hold my breath & I try not to worry. But, most of the time, I do.
Why?? Honestly, it took me a long time to come to this conclusion, but I think it’s that I had (have) some expectations for this child that he’s not fitting into. Babies should nap for 1-2 hours at a time. Umm, mine doesn’t. Your baby can sleep through the night by 12 weeks. Umm, mine doesn’t. If you let him cry, he’ll learn to put himself back to sleep. Umm, mine didn’t. He should be napping 2-3 times a day by 6 months. Umm, mine doesn’t. Again, I’ll stop. But I could continue. I think that because Isaac doesn’t fit the mold that most babies do (who are these most babies anyways?? I’ve never been interviewed or polled for a book or article…), that I am doing something wrong or that I’m harming him in some way. (Example: This one book said overtired babies grow into children who have delayed learning. I freak out and think ‘I’m going to make my baby dumb because I can’t get him to nap! Waaaa!’ A little over the top? Yes. True story? Yes.) And I don’t want to harm my baby, obviously, so because of all the information I’ve heard & gathered about how babies should act, I am frequently anxious.
How am I dealing with this? Well first is prayer. Lots & lots of prayer about Isaac sleeping. Also meditating on verses like this:
“Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer & petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts & your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
Also I’m learning acceptance. Accepting that Isaac is a twice-a-night-waker, schedules-aren’t-for-me, unpredictable sleeper, short napper, made-just-for-us baby boy. I’ve quit trying to force him into a schedule that obviously wasn’t working with his natural rhythms. I’ve quit reading books on sleep. I haven’t looked up a sleep article in like… a week… hey that’s progress. I’ve quit listening to everyone else. And really I’m just letting go of the need to expect him to do something because I heard somewhere babies should do it this way. Isaac is Isaac & he does things his own way! Did I mention I pray a lot?? I’m a work in progress!
Confession: I was really anxious to go to Texas. Isaac flying in an airplane?? Sleeping in a different bed?? Going through a time change?? I expected the worst. A fussy baby, a week without sleep, a horrible transition back to our daily routine at home... But guess what? He slept better in Texas than he does at home! Little punk…
We all had a great time in Texas for Easter!
What a great month for us! I’m learning so much about life, my boys are happy & healthy, & I am tremendously blessed. Is it always easy? No. Is it always fun? Not always. But it’s worth it! May you have a great month & until next time, Isaac says…
We’ll see about that! Until next month! Be blessed!
